Gearing Up for Chemo Round #2

Published on by Jamie Kraus

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I’ve joked a lot about how most of my significant cancer related events have fallen on or around a special occasion whether that be a birthday, anniversary or holiday.  If we count the much hyped solar eclipse that happened today (which I still can’t figure out if I thought it was cool or if I feel like a SUCH A SUCKER for purchasing the $12 eclipse glasses for approximately 10-20 seconds of viewing pleasure) as one of those, then the tradition continues.

 

Tomorrow (August 22) I will undergo round #2 of chemotherapy.  With the anniversary of Jen’s death earlier this month (thank you ALL for your sweet comments and texts), I didn’t feel up to writing about the side effects of round #1.  But I will tell you that it was not fun.  My oncologist told me that a possible side effect of the type of chemo I am undergoing is bone pain.  To which I thought in my head, ‘What is bone pain?!’.  Ladies and gentlemen, now I know.  It was truly excruciating and lasted for a good 5-7 days.  At one point, I considered going to the ER because I couldn’t get it under control (the disclaimer being I wasn’t willing to try narcotics because they make me nauseous).  But then I had a conversation with the nurse and she told me it was normal.  NORMAL. Super. (I say with complete and utter sarcasm.)  This bone pain is due to a shot they give me called ‘Neulasta‘.

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It’s sole purpose is to have my bone marrow work overtime to create healthy white blood cells to fight off infection.  I kept telling myself that at least the shot must be working if I felt so badly.   That worked for about the first minute then I would start complaining again.  I was waiting for the moment when Trevor and I would cozy up on the couch and interlock arms like the couple above but it never happened.  And you know why?!  Cause these people are ACTORS and I can guarantee this lady never received an actual shot.  If she did, her man would be doing this instead:

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Thankfully after chemo, I never got full out nauseated, but was conflicted all the time about whether food would settle my stomach or make everything worse.  I never figured that one out. And there were a few other expected side effects like fatigue, but it’s hard to tell if that’s chemo or just being in my 40’s and raising 3 kids in the dead of August.

A full week after treatment, I was definitely inching my way closer to MY normal and feeling great. I exercised, got some house chores done that I’d put off for months, grocery shopped and watched two of my boys scrimmage in football.  But these last few days, I have started losing my hair.  This is to be expected – even with cold capping – but it is still very unsettling.  The hardest part is that it’s a visual reminder of what I’m dealing with even though I’ve felt so good the past 2 weeks.  Ugh.  Please pray for me to be patient with this aspect.  With a mastectomy, I’ve already had to cross an emotional hurdle and in some ways this feels like another one.  I REALLY like being a girl but feel like some parts of that are being stripped away during this process.  I guess the good news is that in this day and age I can use any bathroom I please regardless of my physical appearance.

Today, I went for another inflation.  The reason being that the days immediately preceding chemo is when I’m at my healthiest and at the least risk of infection.  My friend Jenny drove Stephanie and I to Dr. Potter’s office this morning and boy, were my sweet friends in for a big surprise.  As we say in Texas, bless their hearts.  This process is not for the faint of heart, as mentioned in previous blog posts, but they handled it like champs.

FullSizeRender.jpg-4.jpeg And I’m just gonna say, what happens in Dr. Potter’s office, stays in Dr. Potter’s office.

Lastly, for the record, I noticed a crazy spot on my leg yesterday and then today realized it had changed in color.  I went to the dermatologist to be safe and they decided to take a biopsy because of the way it looked.  I should know those results in about 7 business days.  If ever I felt vibrant, feminine and healthy, this is NOT the time.  The Lord is working on patience in my life and on trusting Him at every turn.

So tomorrow, I start the cycle all over again.  I know this is THE place to ask for your prayers.  I felt them last time and am looking forward to having them carry me through again this go round.  It will be a long day and I’m grateful for a team of friends and family who are rallying around me and keeping me company.  I loved receiving all of your texts and comments last time and appreciate your encouragement more than you know.

And to my precious cancer friends, Lezley and Alyson, who have been through this, thank you for your thoughtful gifts today!!!  I could not do this without you!

IMG_6934.JPG.jpegIMG_6938.JPG.jpegUntil next time…much love to you all & make every day count,

Jamie

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”  Romans 12:12

PS: Is it sad that this makes me feel like I didn’t waste $12?  #totallyworthit #sorrydodger

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36 thoughts on “Gearing Up for Chemo Round #2”

  1. Your blog is really beautiful. Your wit and bubbly personality come right through. No doubt you will be a great model for survival in its finest sense.

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  2. Is it wrong that I look forward to, and giggle profusely, every time you post something new to your blog…about having cancer? Oy!
    I truly marvel at your ability to interweave humor, pain, and iconic media into a fantastic word picture tapestry…seemingly without effort!
    If you ever consider speaking publicly, or go even further out on a limb with a one woman show, just know I’ll be that goofy grinned dude on the front row cheering and laughing…at every show.

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    1. You are the best cheerleader I know. You will no doubt have lifetime tickets to the VIP section if that should ever happen!!!! Thank you for continuing on the journey with me – I absolutely appreciate it more than you know!

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  3. Hello Jamie, my sweet!
    We are all praying for your second round. You are an inspiration and so encouraging! Keep up the good fight ,honey. Praying for your families and precious ones too! Thought of you all summer, remembering that you had mentioned about visiting us at “the Jersey Shore” beach house! Well, maybe next summer, The Lord willing! Big hugs to you, honey and we’ll keep the prayers coming for this second round! Love you, my sweet friend , Anne

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  4. Jamie, I don’t know you, but I wanted to tell you how much I admire the way you are dealing with this with so much grace and humor. I have shared your blog with a friend who is also going through treatment for breast cancer. Thank you so much for being an inspiration. Praying for strength, good health, good biopsy results, and continued humor and grace.

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    1. Thank you so much Mary! I’m so glad you were able to share the blog with a friend. Praying it will help others in a mighty way!! Thank you for reaching out and for commenting. Encouragement is THE BEST MEDICINE!

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  7. Your posts never fail to make me smile
    (and a few tears too) – Tom & I are praying for you and your family every day – sending hugs and many prayers as you fight the hateful side effects of chemo – 🙏❤️🙏

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  10. Laughing at your post while praying for you. I tell my kids “All that matters is what is in your heart. “. Spoken like a true northastener who has never had great hair or a chest. Praying that you beat this. :)))

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  11. Hi Jamie, I just prayed and will keep praying. I’m praying for the right “cocktail,” kind nurses today, physical and emotional strength, and I’m thanking Jesus for your continued humor. You are amazing, truly, and are teaching me so much through your blog. Thank you for taking the time to write it, even when it’s just another thing on your plate. I hope today is a good day, in whatever shape and form is needed. HUGS! xoxoxo Elizabeth

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    1. Thank you so much Elizabeth. Wow. What special words. I’m praying so hard that my journey can help others (in whatever way that may be), so thank you for encouraging me!!!! I hope you are doing well!

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  12. Fresh prayers today for you sweet Jamie. I so remember those cycles between chemo treatments. Mine were always the first week everyday. By that last week, I was feeling fine….then zap…back to square one! But you do get through it with God’s grace and prayers of so many. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I will pray for your patience and healing. Love you!❤️❤️❤️

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  13. Praying for you today! You got this! Looking forward to seeing your beautiful smile around Covenant this year!

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  14. Sweet Jamie-you have my extra prayers today for sure.
    How can your posts be heart-wrenching and bring a smile to my face at the same time? When this is all over and you are all well you need to consider writing as a career!
    Our love to you and yours’.

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  15. Well that’s what I was afraid of since you hadn’t posted anything in a while. I begin mine on Thursday. I do appreciate you sharing your story and pray that it will be easier on you from here on out. I’ll be talking with Sandy tomorrow evening for training on the cold caps but that even seems overwhelming on top of everything else and really wonder if it’s worth it. God bless you!

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  17. Everything I have in my heart to say has been said above. You are truly amazing and remarkable. You will remain in my prayers constantly.

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  18. I’m sure that your clever sense of humor helps as much as your ability to be vulnerable. You are so sweet and funny and honest. I will be praying for your treatment tomorrow and that you will be free from the side effects. You are more than a conqueror. 🤗

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